After three generations have grown up in the house that Andy Breckman built threw together at random, it was time the family packed up and moved on…
Charlene: You forgot me!
She could have just stayed behind, I was just putting them on a vacant lot until the new house was ready.
Yep, I downloaded a Mod The Sims house. I stink at building, and wanted to use a real house. Also, I just love waiting 5 minutes for the graphics to load.
Ethan: Hey, look there’s a tomb down here.
Be careful, there might be a mummy.
Ethan: Oh boy! Maybe he’ll read me a story.
I guess raising kids with a mummy has interesting side effects.
Mummy with really long Egyptian name I didn’t write down: LOVE. LOOOOOOVEEEE!
I guess he’s friendly.
And the object of his affection is Harley!
Ethan, on the other hand, he doesn’t care for.
And the big prize at the end of the tomb is…
Ethan: Nectar.
Well, that could be a nice collection…
Ethan: Two bottles.
Set the mummy on fire.
Ethan: I liked my old garden better.
Well, you just mastered gardening, so you don’t need it.
Ethan: I caught a frog.
Kermit: Why are there so many songs about rainbows? WHAT DOES IT MEAN???
Ethan: Now to max out fishing at the only place spookier than home.
Ghost: Boo!
Ethan: Are you kidding me? My house is haunted, and my aunt is a flaming ghost just like you. And my wife is a GHOST BUSTER! Who’s scared now?
Ghost: Oh, look at the time, I’m missing “Paid Programming.”
Ethan: Mastered fishing, and caught a death fish.
Ah, so that’s what “You’ll catch your death” means.
Ethan: The library isn’t as much fun any more now that I’m allowed to be here.
Try working in one, it gets even worse. (Librarian)
Darlene: Ha ha, your furniture texture isn’t loaded!
Consignment store guy: Do you want me to go to YOUR house with a calendar?
Guess what I sold right after this picture was taken? Yeah, I’m mean, but I really can’t stand hearing the same simlish songs over and over, and Harley won’t do anything but dance and work out if I let him.
Ethan moves on to handiness, and manages not to electrocute himself. I really want to see what Lakisha would do with a ghost spouse.
Ethan: What?
Nothing.
Speaking of which, lets see what Winston Zeddemore is up to.
Lakisha: I want to be Peter Venkman!
No.
Lakisha: Ray Stantz?
No.
Lakisha: Not even Egon Spangler?
Nope.
Lakisha: Meany.
Lakisha: This house is a mess.
Yeah, you’re busting ghosts here several chapters too late.
Look, it’s the oldest member of the Breckman-Kent family!
Luke: DOORBELL. MAYBE I WILL FINALLY FIND A NEW FRIEND. IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE MY BUDDIES MONK AND GURTON DIED, AND MY WI-
Just shut up already and get the door.
Luke: IT IS MY EMPLOYEE, ETHAN KENT.
Ethan: A simbot! Why was I here again? Oh yeah. Can I—A SIMBOT!
Hours (and I do not exaggerate) later…
Ethan: Oh, right. Can I have a promotion?
Luke: SURE YOU DO NOT WANT TO YELL “A SIMBOT” AGAIN?
Ethan: A SIMBOT? Where?
Luke: JUST TAKE YOUR PROMOTION AND GO.
Of course, Luke then gave him the day off so he wouldn’t earn another promotion too soon (Can’t have THAT now, can we?) But we had a productive day anyway. Except for no one getting killed.
Ethan: What?
Nothing.
Ethan: I wonder how I can improve the meal quality from my stove. I know, beat the glass top range with a hammer!
Ethan: Hmm, how shall I make the microwave cook faster.
Bang it with a hammer?
Ethan: BANG IT WITH A HAMMER!
Ethan: Hmm, make the fireplace auto-light…
Bang it with a hammer?
Ethan: BANG IT WITH A HAMMER!
Meanwhile Winston–
Lakisha: Lakisha!
Winston is continuing to bust ghosts, and advance faster than Ethan. Here she is in the Bachelor home. Toni, the bald chick in the back is the town tart. Her hairstyle draws the guys like flies.
And then she sells all the ghosts to the science lab. I don’t know what they do with them, but I hope it’s not keep them in a container for William Atherton to turn off, and set all the ghosts free and cause chaos everywhere.
Ethan: Time to upgrade the trash compactor.
Bang it with a hammer?
Ethan: Don’t be silly.
There’s a strange woman in our shower!
Lakisha: It’s me! I’m washing my hair!
Oh, hi Winston.
Lakisha: (sighs)
Finally found the computer Clark?
Clark: It was on the third floor. Took me 2 days to climb all the stairs. I need a laptop.
Harley: LAPTOP? NO SEE LAPPPPPTOOOOPPPP!
Ah! Strange woman in the bedroom!
Lakisha: It’s me La— Winston. Did you expect me to sleep in that hair?
Kind of.
Oh yeah, Ethan, I forgot to mention something.
Ethan: FIRE! FIRE!
That fireplace…
Ethan: Yeah?
It WAS fireproof, before you made it auto-light.
Ethan: Oops. Sorry.
Don’t apologize to me, you should apologize to Mr. Pyrophobe.
Around this time, Lakisha was finally able to change her lifetime wish from Tomb Explorer. Unfortunately, they were all still WA picks.
So I chose the 20,000 worth of relics one. Piece of cake. Thanks Beef Supreme!
B. S.: Don’t mention it.
Oh, hai.
Here’s America’s Next Food Network Star, HARLEY BULL!
Harley: Egggggs. EGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGS!
Ok, he got cut in the first round.
Charlene: I wish I wasn’t a Kent!
Charlene: I’m starving! What do I do?
Eat your cake? Yeah, you’re still a Kent, all right.
Charlene: Are you sure?
You just aged up at a 8 AM birthday party in your underwear. You’re a Kent. And a kleptomaniac!
AND, you don’t know how to play foozball with another person properly.
AND… You watch the kids channel as a teenager.
Charlene: OK, OK, I get it.
Ethan: Don’t I look bad ass on my bike?
In that outfit? No.
Ethan: But I’ll get a promotion today, that’ll get me a new outfit!
Yeah, that one is TOTALLY bad ass.
Ethan: Shut up.
Lakisha: How does the poltergeist lift this shower without totally destroying the tile?
I dunno, same way it sucked Carol Ann into the TV?
Hey, wait a minute, I know this homeowner! Hi Clarka, how’s the family?
Clarka: Family?
You know, your daughter? Hungry Lyktha?
Clarka: Oh, her. She’s over there.
Um, nice parenting. Hey wait a minute, why is she STILL a baby?
Clarka: Who?
Nevermind.
Lakisha: Hmm, maybe I should introduce myself to my Aunt-in-law.
Clarka: OK, you can leave now.
Lakisha: Not even a thank you.
Well, that’s Clarka! And with that, I think it’s also time for YOU to leave. Bye now!